Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Diaper-Free Emilio

In my last post I mentioned I had started Emilio's early potty training. Also, in one of my early posts I talked about how I started Elimination Communication with Paulo and how it progressed. It was my first time with Paulo and in hindsight, I am amazed at how easy that went. Granted, there have been a few set-backs and for example Paulo has started to pee at night and during naps again, which he wasn't doing anymore at 1 year of age. I am not sure why this happened, but I figure for him to be fully potty trained except for his sleeps at 2 years of age (and even 1 year of age) it is still pretty good. Paulo was never been afraid of the toilet, never refused to go to the bathroom, I had never struggled to try to have him potty trained drastically over one weekend, or had gone through any of the horror stories that I've heard about traditional potty training. Everything had worked so nicely and seemed so natural and seamless, that I couldn't imagine doing it differently with my next baby.  I would definitely try it again the next time around.
 
So, when Emilio was born, I immediately started paying attention to his bowel movements, his signals (such as his gestures, his breathing, and cries) and his patterns when I knew he was going bathroom. Still, I wanted to wait a while before starting for several reasons. Partly because it is such a shock when you have a child, that there is a lot to adjust to before even thinking about potty training, at least for me. Then there was our trip to Mexico, which sort of made it difficult to have a routine or take the time to observe Emilio or to be patient when taking him to the bathroom. By the time we came back from our vacation, I brought out the cloth diapers and started putting everything in practice again.
 
The very first time I took Emi bathroom, I waited for him to wake up from a nap. He had nursed before the nap, so I knew he would need to go. I used an empty margarine container to put under him and held him in the squatting position with his back and head against me. And wouldn't you know it, it worked! Then I tried it again about 10-15 minutes after nursing him and it worked again. At the beginning I had several misses, mainly because once again I was second guessing my hunches about him needing to go bathroom, but once I made a conscious effort to trust my instincts (i.e. if I heard him making grunting sounds I would just go for it), we started having less misses, until we started having entire days without any poopy diapers -- I should actually specify that although Emi does pee when I take him bathroom, at this point I am focusing more on the poops than the pees. This makes the cloth diapering process so much easier and I don't have to spend the entire day in the bathroom!
 
I am so amazed at how easy it seems this time around. It has definitely become second nature to me, and again I feel like I just cannot imagine doing this any other way. I just can't imagine letting the baby deliberately poop himself when you know that is happening, and just ignoring it like it is something he has to get used to!

One thing I have often read as criticisms for EC is that people don't have the time because they work, or they think it is just something for stay at home mom's to do. Granted, I did start ECing with Paulo when I was on mat leave, but it certainly didn't take me the whole year to get started. It probably took me about a month after starting to have a solid grasp of it. Also, I went back to work part-time and we still managed to do it. I was lucky to find a day home where the caregiver was supportive in that, once Paulo was going bathroom at regular intervals and could stay dry without a safety diaper, she was willing to take him potty every hour, even if he didn't really let her know he had to go. But I still disagree in that this is something that only moms staying at home can do. Children are so smart, if moms make the effort to take them when they are around, then a child will not forget what he needs to do. I think this is why EC is so different from potty training: it just sort of naturally happens, and it is not something that is forced on the child over a limited period of time with  an outcome that has to be either a pass or a fail.
 
We will see how this keeps progressing but I'm definitely glad that everything is working so well. Emilio looks happy and I love the feeling of looking at the baby and understanding each other, and knowing that HE KNOWS we are communicating. We will see where this road takes us this time!


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