The grass is always greener in Mexico....

It's been a long time since I last wrote, and it is mainly due to my 3- week vacation in Mexico, and two weeks of absolute madness before that, packing and taking care of a bunch of errands for our big move to Ottawa.

We flew to Mexico on a direct, 5- hour flight which is always a bit scary with a toddler and and infant. However, I am proud to say that both kids handled it like the little troopers they are. Emilio slept through the whole flight and only woke up to eat ( which is absolutely hazzle free due to breastfeeding). Paulo resisted sleeping literally until he just couldn't do it anymore. Sleeping in planes has always been a pain for him, and I don't blame him-- they are uncomfortable, tiny, noisy places, so it is always hard for him to fall asleep. This is always incredibly stressful for me, but I pretty much restrained him in a very tight hug and wispered stories in his ear and eventually he fell asleep. I was lucky to find an empty row ahead of us, so I moved there with Emilio and Paulo was able to stretch out in both seats next to daddy's.

We finally reached our destination, Puerto Vallarta, and as we got off our plane and smelled the humid, salty air, all the stress and worry in our bodies just left with the breeze...



Our little family in Puerto Vallarta

It was such an amazing vacation. To start with, I think going to the beach with a toddler just can't be beat. The fun they have is just unreal, and I found myself in a constant state of excitement for him.  Plus, as a parent, it is so easy to look after a kid in that environment. Of course the ocean can be kind of a danger, but as long as they are supervised, the can play for hours on end in the sand ( with sunscreen of course!) , they love the water, they can run and run without hurting themselves, etc. all this while you enjoy the nature, the calm and the scenery yourself...

The other highlight of the trip was experiencing Mexican culture through Paulo's eyes. People were so incredibly friendly to him all the time. It was not uncommon for strangers to stop and chat with Paulo, or for someone to literally get out of their way to come and see the baby. It is just such a child-friendly culture -- another reason why being on vacation in Mexico is so great for both child and parent. We often went to restaurants where Paulo could just run around along with other kids without us being worried that our kids would disturb other customers or that we would get kicked out. People are just so used to having kids around and tolerating them like a fact of life, especially if the kids are well behaved ( but still kids nonetheless). I can't even count the number of times somebody did something extremely kind for our family, like a random neighbour would unexpectedly invite us into their home because they got a gift for Paulo, or getting a free haircut from my dad's hairdresser just because they knew we were visiting and liked our kids, etc.

Also, having Paulo surrounded by the Spanish language was so amazing. He definitely has a stronger connection to Spanish since him and I always speak it at home and he spends the majority of his time with me. I could see how thrilled he was to understand everything around him and make himself perfectly understood. It was a matter of a couple of days before he started adding words to his vocabulary like it was his job. He totally improved his language skills even more.

Paulo against the pinata

Emilio napping on daddy's shoulder

The thing that completely blew my mind though is how attached Paulo became to everyone in the family, especially his cousins. My sister's kids are 3.5 and 1.5 years old, so Paulo falls right in between. I was honestly a bit worried about the toddlers being typical toddlers and fighting over toys and most importantly, grandparents, but shockingly, I was wrong. They immediately hit it off , hugged and held hands constantly, they followed each other all the time, asked about each other all the time, played together, bossed and followed each other around.... It was adorable to say the least. I was so incredibly happy to see this happen...

so nice to lie on the green grass

However, even though I had an amazing time, I have to say there was always some sort of nostalgia and sadness lingering in me. I always feel this way when I go back home, but this time it was a bit different. This time I felt nostalgic and sad for my son and my family. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach when I saw my nephews so grown up since the last time I saw them. I felt guilty that I am the one pulling this family apart, and taking my sons' cousins, grandparents, aunts and uncles away from them... And I kept wondering what on earth am I thinking to take my sons' away from all this love. I know I have decided to live in Canada mostly for what I believe are good reasons and to give my children a good life, but sometimes it doesn't quite feel like that. I mean, isn't family supposed to be the most important thing in life? .... It is just so tough to go through these thoughts and feelings all over again every time I feel close to my family again...I know I can perfectly justify our being away, but at the moment it is just hard to say goodbye. I guess I can only hope these feelings will get better with time and that time flies before we all get to see each other again next year...

waking up by the beach